Rice Fields, Authenticity & Realisations. Reflections from Bali, Part 1

There’s something about getting away, whether it is a plane ride to somewhere new or simply a shift in routine, that helps you meet yourself again. Maybe it’s the way your senses switch back on, or the long-overdue break where your nervous system gets to rest and play. It’s not always about escaping life… more often, it’s about reconnecting with parts of you beneath all the to-dos and timelines.

Bali was my first solo trip in over five years. My daughter had her first holiday with a friend's family in Italy, and I felt that gentle (excited and nervous) nudge, “Go on, Zak… have your own adventure.” So I went. Passport in hand, backpack on my shoulders, grinning like a kid at the airport. It's my favourite feeling!

Like many, I don’t get long periods off, and travel isn’t always accessible. However, after experiencing many changes, a successful business start-up, and evolving corporate wellbeing and yoga services, this pocket of exploration was long overdue. I was craving the sense of wonder and awe that travel often brings, along with its best aha moments and big smiles.

In a new environment, or on a holiday, I always find the mental space and clarity needed to form a new perspective. The nervous system becomes more attentive in unfamiliar surroundings or moments, allowing for greater change. This shift is what scientists call 'neuroplasticity': the brain's ability to adapt and rewire through experience (I'll delve deeper into this concept and how to build awareness in my first newsletter).

For me, that meant scooter rides through rice fields, saying yes to being me with the people I love, walking into my first Brazilian Jiu Jitsu class (thank you, Woven and Ali — more to come on this in Part 2), and after a long while, reconnecting with my playful side.

It's really important to note that travel isn't the only way to meet ourselves.

Sometimes, choosing something different - a pause, a boundary, not replying to the group chat, or embracing a gentler morning- creates space to meet ourselves more honestly. In that space, we uncover a clearer sense of who we are. It may feel uncomfortable initially, but that’s precisely where neuroplasticity begins to take shape.

“What are you growing from?”

One afternoon, lounging by the pool with my friends Jade and Rich, two people who truly embody their true selves. Rich asked me a question that stopped me in my tracks:

“What are you unlearning right now, or what have you realised about yourself that you want to grow from?”

I paused, looking at him, completely lost, as I wasn’t expecting such a profound question while tanning by the pool (see below). We all laughed at the mind-melt moment.

5 minutes before Richard's question!

Then I answered,

“Just being me — without the need to perform or do.”

I’ve been intentionally cultivating that — trusting that I don’t need to do anything to be loved or included. I’m learning to speak up when it matters, to trust my voice again, and to let go of perfection, making space instead for silliness, strength, and authenticity.

For many years, I carried an outdated belief. I used to catch myself saying, 'Sorry if this is boring you,' a phrase that stemmed from a belief I had to be 'interesting, engaging, giving'. But I’ve realised, primarily through my nervous system awareness, that this was a safety strategy. It was my nervous system's way of seeking safety: perform, please, keep people close.

I’ve realised that what I was projecting onto others resulted from my nervous system overfunctioning. By allowing others to be, I’ve also learned to let myself be. During our trip, Jade and I reflected on how some of the best moments are simply sitting with a friend, chatting for hours, or enjoying a silence that doesn’t need to be filled.

One of my most 'me' moments in Bali? Zipping through the rice fields on the back of a Gojek scooter, incense in the air, scooters whizzing by, wind on my face and a wide-mouth grin. It wasn’t the ride but the freedom and play, meeting myself exactly as I am.

"Perhaps true intimacy begins when we recognise that it’s not perfection we seek, but authenticity." — The School of Life.

As a Yoga Therapist in training, Yoga Teacher, and Corporate Wellbeing Coach, I encourage my community to pause, breathe, and reflect. Many of us feel subtle pressure to fill the silence, keep things light, or not walk in vulnerability. But our greatness lies in being daringly ourselves.

Take a breath here, if it feels right.

Let these questions land and ask yourself the next time you need to make a choice:

• Am I being true to myself or trying to make others more comfortable?

• Is this aligned with my values?

• Am I speaking from a wound?

  
  

Sometimes, pausing, noticing how your body is reacting, and taking a breath is the first step in choosing differently, or shall I say, more authentically.

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Performance Mode and Nervous System Truths

This isn’t just for our personal lives. It also affects how we show up in the workplace. Being authentic is vital to being our best selves and reaching our fullest potential.

Creativity flows, leadership deepens, and connection strengthens when our nervous system feels safe. Learning to listen and align with our values makes us better colleagues, partners, and friends.

Our brains and bodies are wired to protect us, often in ways we’re unaware of. For me, the habit of “performing” or stepping outside my values wasn’t about inauthenticity — it was a learned response to maintain connection and psychological safety. However, these patterns can limit our ability to build meaningful personal and professional relationships over time.

Neuroscience shows that our ability to tune into our internal signals, known as interoception, plays a key role in managing stress and accessing clarity.

Often, our most authentic choices emerge in the space between reaction and response. When we make those choices, we create the conditions for better teamwork, deeper intimacy, and a stronger sense of self (more on this in my first newsletter - sign up below).

Social Media and Authentic Connection

In the world of social media, we have access to world events, share stories, and support each other in once-unimaginable ways — even send memes to our friends that make us laugh out loud. But the flip side can be the pressure to seek validation, which hinders authenticity and a true sense of connection.

At a time when so much is unfolding, from personal shifts to, importantly, global heartbreak and injustice, especially in Gaza and across the Middle East, it feels more important than ever to stay anchored in truth, compassion, and presence. Being true to yourself is not a weakness — it’s a source of resilience and allows us to show up for others as we stay true to ourselves.

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At this year's Mental Health Awareness Week workshop for Santander UK,

I shared the following quote. I hope it resonates with you too..

“when the world comes crashing

at your feet

it’s okay to let others help

pick up the pieces

if we’re present to take part

in your happiness

when your circumstances are great

we are more than capable

of sharing your pain”

— Rupi Kaur - Community

A Reflection for you:

• What choice can you make this week that genuinely reflects who you are and your values?

• How can you cultivate trust in your tribe, knowing they will show up for you just as you do for them?

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A big shout-out to the friends who embody authenticity — Jade and Rich, for your presence, humour and realness in life and during my time in Bali. And to Bo, Shazia, Christine, Naila, Iman, Kurtis and more — you remind me that authenticity is built in the micro moments of our day-to-day interactions and by being true to yourself.

So here's to being exactly as you are, whether that’s smiling on a scooter, dancing to your favourite song, or simply telling someone you’re not okay today. By allowing yourself to be your true self, you empower others to do the same.

All my love,

Zakiya

Want to go deeper into how we build nervous system capacity for authenticity?

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